Summary
90 Day Fiancé: The Other Way’snewcast member James may appear harmless, but he displays some concerning personality traits. James and his wife, Meitalia, moved to Indonesia during90 Day Fiancé: The Other Wayseason 6in search of answers toMeitalia’s mysterious medical condition. As he prepared to move, James repeatedly avoided having the difficult conversations needed to wrap up his life in America. James’s unsettling habit of withholding crucial information created unnecessary chaos for him and Meitalia.
James and Meitalia began their relationship when he lived in Maine, and she lived in Indonesia. They were together for two years before getting married. After they got married, Meitalia moved to Maine and attempted to settle into life in America. However, she became ill and couldn’t find answers from doctors in America. Meitalia and James decided to move to Indonesia in an attempt to improve her health. Meitalia left for Indonesia on her own, while James stayed behind for another month to save money.
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James Avoided Telling His Family About His Imminent Move To Indonesia
His Fear Of Disappointing His Family Only Made The Situation Worse
James and Meitalia kept their move to Indonesia a secret from their closest friends and family. James worked at his family’s business as an elevator mechanic.He feared he would lose his job once his family discovered his plans to relocateto Indonesia. Rather than giving his work the appropriate notice, James avoided telling them he planned to move until the last minute.
James’s refusal to be straightforward with his family became a major red flagwhen he revealed he was previously in a similar situation. James was married before and left Maine and the family business to move to Florida with his first wife. The family business suffered in his absence and was forced to downsize. When James finally sat down with his brother to admit he was moving to Indonesia within days, James’s brother was understandably upset that James was putting the family in a predicament again. James showed no sign of having learned from his prior actions.
James handled the situation irresponsibly as an employee, and he also handled it poorly on a personal level. James had a close relationship with his family, and he did not give them time to process his leaving. Meitalia urged James to speak to his family before it was too late, but he ignored her advice. Meitalia did not have the chance to say goodbye to James’s family in person before she left for Indonesia. Worrying over hurting her relationship with James’s family added to Meitalia’s already-high anxiety.
James Blindsided Meitalia With Heartbreaking News About Their Dog
The day before Meitalia departed for Indonesia, James surprised her with some unsettling news.James and Meitalia would need to leave their dog, Jojo, as they didn’t complete the required health certifications. Although James avoided admitting to it, it was obvious he failed to follow the protocols that would allow Jojo to join them.This is another sign of how he and Meitalia haphazardly handled their move.
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Meitalia was beside herself upon finding out she would be leaving Jojo behind. Her response seemed disproportionate, considering Jojo would be able to join them in Indonesia eventually. However, Meitalia’s emotional reaction revealed how fragile she was at that moment. She was preparing to move across the world while dealing with health problems, and her husband waited until she was already in a vulnerable mental state to pile on the bad news. At that moment, James displayed his callousness and lack of consideration for Meitalia.
James And Meitalia Postponed Discussing Their Financial Future Until The Last Minute
Their Conversation Proved Just How Unprepared They Were To Move
Earlyin90 Day Fiancé: The Other Wayseason 6, James expressed his concern about not having a job lined up in Indonesia.He even attempted to sell his record collection to earn some extra cash, which shows just how ill-prepared he was financially. James admitted he only had enough savings to support himself and Meitalia for a few months.If James couldn’t find a job in Indonesia immediately, he planned to work for the banana chip business Meitalia’s family owns.
James and Meitalia did not discuss their financial future in-depth until they were driving to the airport. That’s when Meitalia told James her family would not be paying him to work for their business. This sent James into a panic.Meitalia then clarified that James could earn money through her family’s business, but he would have to sell the banana chips on his own.
The fact that James and Meitalia waited to have this discussion until minutes before she left for Indonesia, shows howpoorly James and Meitalia executed their move. Considering they had been married for two and a half years at that point, they should have communicated better and taken their time to formulate a solid plan before moving. James’ willingness to rely on working for Meitalia’s family without confirming any details about what type of money he would earn is alarmingly careless.
James Was Not Honest With His Wife About His Change Of Heart
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The day before Meitalia left Maine for Indonesia, she finally broke the news of her move to her best friend. While her friend was surprised, their conversation also left Meitalia shaken.Meitalia’s friend mentioned that James had said he was scared of having children despite having led Meitalia to believe he was ready to start a family. Meitalia was upset, but because she was leaving so soon, she did not have a chance to discuss the matter with James before she left.
Meitalia’s reaction seemed overblown. She had no facts to prove her husband was lying to her, and the whole thing could have easily been a miscommunication. However, it turns out her suspicion about James’s dishonesty was correct.James admitted to his brother that he no longer wanted to have children after seeing the current state of the world. James had not told Meitalia about his change of heart, and to make matters worse, he had also promised Meitalia’s family that they would have children.
James’s habit of avoiding difficult conversations is leaving chaos in his wake. His avoidance is damaging his family and work, and now, his inability to be honest with Meitalia may threaten his marriage. James shows a startling lack of understanding of the impact his actions, or inactions, have on those around him. He is likely to reveal even more red flags as90 Day Fiancé: The Other Wayseason 6 continues.
90 Day Fiancé: The Other Wayairs Sundays at 8 p.m. EDT on TLC.
